Jul 22, 2018
I’m told, and I believe, that nurturing close relationships is an avenue to genuine feelings of happiness. And copious research shows this to be true for humans across the board. The long-term Harvard study showed that the quality and accessibility of relationships was a bigger predictor of mortality than smoking. In short, disconnection is bad for our health.
So why might we struggle to hold relationships that are honest, vulnerable and dependable? I believe we get trapped in feelings of not being worthy…in some form. These feelings literally shape our physical form and mold our behaviors of how we treat others and ourselves. To be in relationship with others, we must find a peaceful, authentic relationship within ourselves. To be in relationship with ourselves, we need to lift our heads to take in our surroundings and feel inward to the safety of our bodies in the present.
Being able to connect, is dependent upon our willingness to risk. There is inherent risk in exploring, learning new skills, creating something different and asking for something from others. Yet this is where growth happens and can only be fully accessed when we connect to our own wisdom. None of these endeavors will take place with our heads down and stuck in the past or future fears of the mind. The power of an authentic relationship with self is finding the knowing that regardless of the outcome of a risk, all will be well. And it will be so as you find the well-being within your own skin that tells a story of connection and support. In turn, the relationships that fulfill us and bring happiness become available to us.
In the realm of yoga, the back of our body is associated with what we call universal energy, god, spirit, etc…you choose the belief that resonates with you. In particular, the lumbar area around the kidneys (thoracolumbar junction) can be a part of the body that has poor breath mobility. This restriction limits our posterior diaphragm function and inhibits full diaphragmatic breathing. A lot of challenges can arise in our physiology and biomechanics when our breath doesn’t move as fully as it’s able. And when we lift our heads and open the front of our body without this back body spaciousness, it can leave us with a feeling of forced vulnerability. However, connecting here through breath movement first can bring a feeling of connection and trust even though risks will be taken by opening. In my experience, this somatic (body) state is where authentic connection happens with those around you. Want to feel this for yourself? Watch here…